Say hello to your three brains: Why your head, heart and gut need to be working in partnership to make decisions that feel good.

Welcome to the new way of making decisions, research is changing the way we think about decision making. The world we live in is structured around reason and logic -and when it comes to decision making we are often in our heads.

Instinctively many of us find this jarring, head decisions can only take us so far until we feel paralysed by indecision, or scared to take the next step, or afraid to put strategies in place that logically make sense, but feel wrong (take some of the baby sleep strategies out there 🤦‍♀️)

Think of it like this.

How often do you say things like “my head says one thing, but my heart says another,” or “I just had a gut feeling.” These phrases are clues to the interplay of the three core centres of intelligence: the

⭐️ head brain (logic and analysis),
⭐️ heart brain (emotion and values)
⭐️ gut brain (instinct and identity).

When these three brains are in harmony, communicating expertly, your decisions feel aligned and powerful, you feel in flow, everything seems to be falling into place. But…… when they are at odds — when instinct pulls one way, the heart hesitates, and the head overanalyses — this is when you can feel stuck, frustrated and untethered. Sometimes this also feels like inertia. It can lead to anxiety and a sense of being in the wrong place, or having not quite “got it right”.

Understanding how unconscious drivers or blocks can throw those three brains out of sync, but you can learn simple tools that help you make difficult decisions, both big and in the moment.

Let’s break it down into three different scenarios that I see this play out.

1. In the Workplace: Leadership, Creativity & Self-Trust

Head: In professional settings, the head brain usually takes the lead. It analyses, evaluates, weighs pros and cons, and plans. But it can also overthink, stall decisions, or default to what seems rational even when there is a part of you that is holding back, or just doesn’t’ really feel it’s the right thing to do.

Heart: The heart brain brings in relational intelligence — compassion, values, purpose. Ignoring it can lead to burnout or misalignment. Think of the manager who’s “good on paper” but disconnected from their team’s morale.

Gut: The gut offers fast, embodied knowing. It notices energy shifts, tone of voice, incongruence. It’s the “something’s off here” that’s hard to explain but often right.

Common Block: Many professionals have been trained to suppress intuition or emotion because this can be connected with risk, however risk is where growth exists.

Overriding gut instinct or heart wisdom can also create internal dissonance and decision fatigue.

Tool – One Question:
🧠 “What do I think?”
❤️ “What truly matters here?”
💛 “What does my gut know before I explain it?”

2. In Life: Identity, Alignment & Inner Conflict

Head: In daily life decisions — where to live, how to spend your time, what direction to take — the head may seek certainty. The head does not like ambiguity.

Heart: The heart wants meaning. It tracks what feels fulfilling or soul-nourishing. But emotional wounds or people-pleasing patterns can cloud this signal.

Gut: The gut holds your core identity. It often flags discomfort before your mind catches on. It’s instinctive, primal — often tied to boundaries and survival responses.

Unconscious Driver: If you’ve learned not to trust your own gut (perhaps from gaslighting or growing up in unsafe environments), you may default to overthinking or emotional reactivity. Your gut is still speaking to you — you’ve just been trained not to listen to it.

Tool – One Question:
🧠 “What story am I telling myself about this?”
❤️ “What would feel more aligned, even if it scares me?”
💛 “Where in my body do I feel the yes or no?”

3.In Parenting: Presence, Patterning & Protection

Head: The head often tries to “get it right.” It researches, compares, plans routines. But parenting isn't a puzzle to solve — it’s a relationship to nurture. We want our kids to be “happy and to thrive” so we lean into patterns and advice that offer solutions to this.

Heart: This is where empathy, connection, and love live. Yet the heart can be hijacked by guilt or fear — especially if you're parenting differently than you were parented. But….your heart has some helpful answers on how to parent your children.

Gut: The gut brain activates protective instinct. It sets boundaries, senses threat, reacts fast. But it can also become hypervigilant if you’ve experienced trauma — leading to overreaction or emotional shutdown, it can be hard to self-regulate if the gut is triggered based on past experiences.

Unconscious Block: Old parenting scripts (e.g. “Don’t be too soft,” “Kids should listen the first time”) can override your heart or gut. These inherited patterns act as invisible drivers until you notice and challenge them.

Tool – One Question:
🧠 “Am I reacting or responding?”
❤️ “What does my child need emotionally right now?”
💛 “What is my body telling me that I can’t vocalise?”

Practice this!

Bringing It Together: Realigning.

When faced with a big decision or moment of inertia, try this:

1. Pause.

2. Ask each brain the question.

3. Notice where the conflict lies.

4. Don’t force and answer, just listen

5. Lean into the wisest part of you, where it feels most comfortable

6. Final Thoughts

Each brain brings a gift:

• The head offers clarity.
• The heart brings compassion.
• The gut delivers courage.

When they work together, you move through life with integrity and ease. You don’t have to choose one over the other. You can learn to tune into each, and trust that your deepest wisdom comes when all three are heard.

“I know what I should do, but it doesn’t feel right.”
“I’m torn between being sensible and being happy.”

Ask each brain its question.

1. Listen. Don’t rush the answer.

2. Align. Which centre is over-dominant? Which one needs a voice?

3. Act. From the wisest place, not the loudest.

🔗 Book your Power of One session here
Clear head, light heart, instinctive gut.